So I did it. Emailed my friend, B. My best friend, really. Or at least till now. Ok that was over-dramatic. No I don’t think she’ll freak out and dump me, but I’m apprehensive nonetheless. I’m not used to this. I don’t ask for approval. I’m much more take-it-or-leave-it in my approach. But that’s the luxury of short relationships, brief stints in one place and then a move halfway around the world that puts more of a strain on most relationships than they can bear. Ties break and I move on, comfortable in the knowledge that there will be more people, more experiences, more relationships. This holding on is new. B and I have now known each other for almost 11 years. The only other person who knows is F, who I’ve known for 12 years. It was easier to tell her because she’s bi herself. Back when I wrote to her, it was more about getting some kind of support or acknowledgment that I wasn’t a horrible person, and maybe a little advice. And she gave me exactly what I’d needed at the time.
There are a few others who fall into that range, and really it’s them that I want to sit down and talk to, even though we’re scattered around the globe now. It’s them I miss most these days. And B. Damn. I’m going to be on edge till she writes back.